If you are considering therapy, you may be wondering whether EMDR or talking therapy would be more helpful. Both involve working with a therapist, but the experience of the two can feel quite different.
Talking therapy generally gives you space to explore your thoughts, emotions, relationships and experiences through conversation. EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) is a more structured form of psychotherapy that can help you process distressing memories and experiences that continue to affect you in the present.
Neither approach is automatically “better”. What matters is what you are struggling with, what you want from therapy and which approach is appropriate for you.
What Is Talking Therapy?
Talking therapy is a broad term covering several different therapeutic approaches. Although they work in different ways, conversation and the therapeutic relationship are usually central to the process.
In person-centred counselling, for example, you are not given a programme to follow or told what you should think. Instead, therapy provides a confidential relationship in which you can explore your experiences, emotions and sense of self.
You might talk about something that happened recently, a relationship, childhood experiences, anxiety, grief or patterns you have begun to notice in your life. One particular memory or event doesn’t necessarily have to be at the centre of the work.
For some people, having the space to talk openly and feel genuinely heard can be an important part of understanding themselves and creating change.
How Is EMDR Different From Talking Therapy?
EMDR includes talking, especially during assessment, preparation, and discussions about what you want to work on. However, the processing part of EMDR works differently.
Rather than spending the session primarily talking through an experience, you may focus on aspects of a distressing memory while using bilateral stimulation, such as guided eye movements or alternating tapping.
The aim is to help the brain reprocess memories that continue to cause distress.
This means you do not normally have to give a detailed verbal account of everything that happened. Your therapist will need enough information to understand your experiences and work with you safely, but EMDR does not depend on repeatedly retelling the whole story.
If EMDR sounds slightly strange at first, you are certainly not alone. Some of the most common EMDR myths and misconceptions come from the eye movements receiving far more attention than the rest of the therapeutic process.
What Does an EMDR Session Feel Like?
EMDR is usually more structured than person-centred talking therapy.
It follows a recognised therapeutic process that includes assessment, preparation, identifying memories to work with, processing and reviewing what changes.
You remain aware and in control throughout. EMDR is not hypnosis, and you can ask questions, slow down or stop.
You also should not expect to walk into your first appointment and immediately begin processing your most distressing experience. What happens in an EMDR session explains the different stages and what you might experience in more detail.
Is EMDR Better for Trauma?
EMDR is particularly well established as a treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and trauma is one of the main reasons people seek it.
A traumatic memory can sometimes feel different from an ordinary memory. You may know that an event happened years ago, yet a reminder can bring back fear, physical sensations, images or emotions that feel immediate.
EMDR aims to help the memory become less distressing so that remembering what happened no longer feels as though part of you is experiencing it again.
This is explored further in EMDR for PTSD. Where experiences happened repeatedly during childhood, the work may be more complex, which I discuss in EMDR for childhood trauma.
However, this does not mean talking therapy has no place in trauma work. Some people value more space to explore the meaning of their experiences, their relationships, and how the past has shaped how they see themselves.
Can You Combine EMDR and Talking Therapy?
Yes. It does not always have to be a choice between one or the other.
There can be times when talking is valuable and times when working more directly with particular memories using EMDR is helpful. Therapy can also change as the work develops.
For example, someone may understand intellectually why they react in a particular way and have talked extensively about what happened, yet still experience a strong emotional or physical response when something triggers the memory. EMDR may offer another way of working with that experience.
Equally, processing a memory does not necessarily address every aspect of someone’s life. There may still be important work around relationships, identity, boundaries, loss or understanding yourself.
EMDR or Talking Therapy: Which Is Right for Me?
There is no simple answer.
EMDR may be worth considering when particular experiences or memories continue to trigger significant distress, anxiety or trauma responses. Talking therapy may be particularly valuable if you want space to explore yourself, your relationships, emotions or difficulties without focusing primarily on processing specific memories.
Your preference matters too. Some people naturally prefer an exploratory talking approach; others are drawn to the greater structure of EMDR.
Most importantly, base your decision on a proper assessment rather than choosing a therapy because it seems quicker or more powerful. My guide to whether EMDR is right for you looks at some of the factors worth considering before starting.
As a BACP-accredited psychotherapist trained in both counselling and EMDR, I can use both approaches rather than trying to fit every difficulty into one type of therapy.
I offer face-to-face therapy in Swansea and online sessions across the UK. If you are unsure whether EMDR, talking therapy, or a combination of the two might suit you. Contact me for a free consultation so we can discuss what brings you to therapy and consider the most appropriate way forward.
